Tuesday, December 29, 2009

2 drink maximum

There's another bullshit comedy trivia thing tonight and I'm actually going to attend. The Comedian will be there, of course, and while I think it's probably been long enough for me to be in the same room as him without wanting to rip my heart out of my chest and stomp it on the ground so it stops stinging sogoddamnmuch...you never know. I truly am a glutton for punishment. There are only a few ways this could possibly go:

Scenario A: The way that would work best for me -
Comedian: Hey, sorry I've been such a jerk. Let's start over.
Me: Ok! (smile and take sip of champagne while girlishly batting my eyelashes)

Scenario B: The way it will probably go down -
Comedian: Hey.
Me: ...hey. (blink a lot, bite my lip, and try to look like I'm not even bothered)

Scenario C: Worst-case scenario -
I enter the room and the music stops while the spotlight is rerouted to my face and I'm met with a chorus of crickets and that trumpet sound that's played when someone fails on the Price Is Right.

Only time will tell. But if I know myself at all, I'd say it's probably best to stay away from any sort of alcohol, or I'll certainly make a mess of things. The place demands a 2 drink minimum (which I think is incredibly annoying) so I'll probably just have to stick with two $5 Diet Cokes. Or flask my two alcoholic beverages and give them to a homeless person or something. To be continued...


Alf said...

May I suggest you try the PBR?

articulicious said...


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