I wonder if Zach Galifianakis has a girlfriend. Not that it would matter, though. It's too late to get in on that shit, thanks to the fucking Hangover. A year ago it might have been an actual possibility to get someone like Zach Galifianakis to go out with me.
Physically, we're a decent match; both of us have some rather fetching physical attributes, and we also both have parts of our bodies that should indefinitely be wrapped up and covered entirely by fabric or hair.
A year ago, I would have seemed like a pretty cute girl to a dude like Galifianakis! But now that he's in one of the most popular (and wildly overrated) films of the year, I'm sure that I look like a troll compared to the girls that are throwing themselves at him now.
I should have gotten his attention when he was still oafish and riddled with insecurities. I needed to strike while the iron was hot.
Success: the ultimate cockblocker.